Bollocks, complete bollocks. I know you say not to reply to this address, but there's no way I'm ringing you up to explain - as you'll be taking money from me via a phone bill.
Sure, yes, my broadband account, great. You've taken a £5 fee for it? Good. But how the fuck can you take £5 if you don't know my details???
There's also one slight problem in your stunning email:
I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING ORANGE BROADBAND ACCOUNT!!!
Work that one out sherlock. In future, refer to customers using their name at the start of an email. I've taken the courtesy to put your name at the beginning, but you simply wrote 'Hello'. Surely you've got my name on your database? As you've apparently got my 'incorrect' account details.
If you're a phishing scam artist, then you've missed one feature of phishing scams - a link for me to actually click on and be re-directed to your website, to enter my account details. Simply putting a link in plain-text format doesn't really work I'm afraid.
So, take all this into your tiny little head and realise that I don't have any connections with Orange (apart from the odd fruit I purchase from Tesco) and never will.
Matthew Juffs (there's my name for you to use in future communications)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: firstname.lastname@example.org [mailto:email@example.com] Sent: 14 March 2007 10:01 To: me Subject: Your Orange Broadband - payment required
You broadband account no: 3633268
We're having trouble taking payment for your broadband account using the details you provided and have taken a £5 late payment fee from your account. It's probably something simple like your credit card's expired or bank account details aren't quite right.
It's easy to fix, just go to https://www.orange.co.uk/membercentre/youraccount/ to change your details online, or give us a call on 0870 010 2462* or 0870 1900 672* if you're on our Broadband Starter package between 7am and 11pm, any day of the week.
Please do this quickly, otherwise your broadband service will be suspended and you won't be able to get online.
Get in touch and we'll sort things out as quickly as possible.
* Your call will cost up to 7p/min from a BT line, or 4p/min via Wireless & Talk. Charges from other networks may vary and calls might be recorded.
Please don't reply to this email. You can call us on the number above instead, or write to us at: Customer Support PO Box 486, Rotherham, S63 5ZX
Orange Personal Communications Services Limited, Registered in England, Company No.: 2178917, Registered Office: St James Court, Great Park Road, Almondsbury Park, Bradley Stoke, Bristol BS32 4QJ
Orange Home UK plc - Verulam Point, Station Way, St Albans, AL1 5HE. Company Registration No: 03014367
OHCS II - ServiÃ§os de Internet, LDA Rua de SÃ£o Francisco No 3, 2 Andar; 9000-050 Funchal; Madeira; Portugal
-- No virus found in this incoming message. Checked by AVG Free Edition. Version: 7.5.446 / Virus Database: 268.18.11/721 - Release Date: 13/03/2007 16:51
Posted: Wednesday 14th March 2007, 14:42pm
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